Have you ever had one of those days were nothing seems to be going right. You spill breakfast all over yourself, hot water in your shower is suddenly non-existent, your running late for work and your gas light goes on just as you pull out of your driveway, and as your running to your office spilling coffee on yourself, you realize that today is the one day out of the week that your boss actually comes in early. Well, this is my life. According to my closest friends, I'm gonna need a few hours on air to be able to fully run my VH1 Behind the Music special. My motto has become, "If it can go wrong, it will happen to me."

I am the oldest of three daughters, a recovering catholic, and a survivor of a rough childhood with addict parents. I had never realized how much I had endured and how long I had actually been depressed until I turned 30. I became the mom of a beautiful baby girl, and everything changed. My world went awry as I frantically realized that I was beautifully broken. Broken by life, love, family and loss. Beautifully, because somehow even through it all I've always managed to have a glimmer of hope. I needed to find a way to fix it. I needed a way to get rid of the broken and keep the beautiful. I was a mom now and I vowed to be a better person for my daughter, as many of us new parents do. I needed to pick up the pieces of my broken self and let go of my past. I needed to embracing the reality of who I truly was, and believe that I was and still am beautiful.

First and foremost before I embark on this journey, I must share that I accept the fact that life will not stop throwing me curve balls with a wicked sense of humor. And that is OK. I will embrace it and I will happily share those stories too, good or bad.

This is my journey.